GEOGRAPHICALLY CHALLENGED

Foxhole Stars v North Petherwin

North or south? We might be a very, very long way south in Britain at Foxhole Stars’ Goverseth ground but this sort of hardcore grassroots scene would be familiar to Northern sports fans too.

I AM A BIT OF A SPORTS GEEK, it has to be said. If it runs, jumps, rolls, tackles or kicks, I will watch it – and probably be prepared to offer an opinion on it.

I love things like the Winter Olympics where you can instantly become an expert on things like ski-cross or the short-track speed skating relay, even though I have never been on a pair of skis in my life and my one attempt at skating ended with lots of bumps and bruises as I spent more time laying on the ice than gliding over it.

I will watch football at all levels, from a kickaround in the park to the World Cup final. And, if I didn’t have to go to work, I would tour the world watching cricket and soaking up the sunshine in Barbados, Brisbane and Bangalore.

And one of the sports I really love is rugby league. Yes, this hardcore southern softie loves a sport which is the epitome of northern grittiness.

Except, I don’t believe in the north/south divide.

People oop north live much the same lives as those darn sarf – working hard to make a living, working hard for their families, and then working hard to enjoy themselves when they can. Ordinary people in Cornwall have more in common with the ordinary folk in Yorkshire than they would both sometimes care to admit but they are all trying to make the best of the opportunities that come their way.

The only thing they do differently up north is talk funny.

However, if you dropped a rugby league-loving Yorkshireman into Foxhole Stars’ Goverseth ground, plugged his ears so that he couldn’t hear the local accent and indicated to him that a sporting event was about to take place, he could be easily forgiven for believing that a match in the 13-a-side code was about to break out.

It looks and feels, well, northern.

And that’s no surprise, because this is mining country. Not the coal of Arthur Scargill and the north of England, nor yet the tin of Poldark and the wild Celtic west, but the kaolin of Clay Country, which has been taken from the ground in these parts for more than 250 years for use in the likes of papermaking, paints and porcelain.

It is a proper industrial landscape and I love the honesty and feel of it.

I loved the honesty of this cup tie too.

My imagined abandoned Yorkshireman, who would love the physicality, pace and commitment of rugby league, would have seen the same traits amply displayed in this well-fought and well-contested game of association football. He would not have been disappointed in the action.

Action from the KMD Developments Duchy League KO cup Second Round tie between Foxhole Stars (in white) and North Petherwin at Foxhole’s Goverseth ground.

This was a tie in the Second Round of the KMD Developments Duchy League Knockout Cup, with a place in the quarter-finals up for grabs. I had been here at the same stage last season and had seen the Foxes see off Torpoint Athletic Thirds 4-3 in a real cup cracker.

And the last time I had seen the Badgers of North Petherwin in action was in the semi-finals of this same competition last season when they lost 5-4 to St Dennis Reserves. Would it be greedy of me to ask for something similar once again?

Well, I was a bit worried when I looked up the Duchy League Premier Division results between these two from earlier this season. True, Stars had won the most recent meeting, here at Goverseth, 3-1 but the first meeting of the campaign at North Petherwin had ended 0-0. Hmm, I didn’t want that to happen again!

Now, I have got this far into this blog and have not yet mentioned the weather. That’s a rarity in this wettest of wet football seasons. In truth, this game was never in doubt as the pitch was in half-decent condition, but other ties I considered going to, at St Cleer and St Stephen, were both called off as the incessant rain collected yet more victims. Foxhole played their first round tie in this cup back on November 4, with North Petherwin having won their opening tie on October 21 – five months ago!

The Duchy League Cup is therefore taking some time to work up a head of steam – with St Dennis Reserves and St Mawgan still trying to play their first round tie. It was called off again on Saturday. Who would be a fixtures secretary, eh?

Happily for me, there was plenty of action at Goverseth, with decent, lower league tackles flying in, the mud flecking shirts and shorts with the evidence of honest toil, defenders making proper “‘ave it” clearances which landed in another parish, and the air being filled with exhortations and advice from all sides.

A quick check on the internet, showed that the away players had faced a journey of just under 40 miles to get to this Clay Country venue, which apparently is a bit of a long trip at this level, at least according to The Badgers’ keeper. Unhappy with some of his side’s early efforts he came out with a quote which would leave philosophy students pondering its import for many a long evening.

“We didn’t come all this way not to turn up,” he cried. Definitely something to think about.

By this stage, his side was a goal down. It had taken the home team 29 minutes to fashion their first real chance, which the philosophical keeper had done just enough to keep out, but he was beaten just a minute later and Foxhole were in front.

The man in white here, I believe, is Martin Gilbert, who netted twice for Foxhole Stars. I am starting to get the hang of the zoom on my camera phone – and the action was quite close too!

I believe the goal was scored by Martin Gilbert who, the home side’s chatty linesman later informed me, had been signed from local veterans’ football. “We were surprised nobody else picked him up,” said the lino and “Gilly” certainly looked a top player at this level. Nice to see the old ‘uns teaching the young ‘uns a thing or two.

Many, many, years ago when I was a young sports reporter, one of my jobs was to sit in the office on a Monday morning rewriting all the rugby (union not league) reports that clubs had sent in. Almost invariably, they began by saying that they were playing uphill against the wind in the first half before staging a valiant comeback after the interval. It seemed to happen every week and I had to edit it out every week.

But, on Saturday, that scenario did look likely to come true. North Petherwin had, indeed, been playing uphill against the wind before the break and, as they kicked off the second half with the elements in their favour, they poured forward in search of an equaliser, which duly arrived on 52 minutes.

Sadly, for them though, that was about as good as it got for The Badgers, as The Foxes bit back hard.

They restored their lead on 66 minutes with a fine volleyed strike from the edge of the box by Steve Kellow. The lino informed me it was a rare goal by the defender, adding: “He doesn’t get many with his feet. Mind you, he doesn’t get many with his head, either.”

Petherwin then pushed more players forward in search of a second equaliser but they rarely seriously threatened the home goal and, as the clock ticked over to 90 minutes, the home side sealed the tie as Gilbert wriggled clear in the box to fire home his second of the game.

It all meant that North Petherwin faced a despondent journey home, heading back in a north-easterly direction after their cup hopes had gone south, while Foxhole Stars could still dream of being the best in this part of the cup footballing west.

Dreams and despondency – they are the same wherever and whatever you play, there’s no geographical divide when it comes to winning and losing.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to sign off. I have a lost imaginary Yorkshireman to repatriate – and I have an amateur rugby league match between Wath Brow and Kells to catch up on in my TV recordings.

THE STATISTICS BIT AND MORE PICTURES

Foxhole Stars 3 North Petherwin 1

(Half-time 1-0)

Played at Goverseth, Foxhole, on Saturday, March 31, 2018

KMD Developments Duchy League Knockout Cup Second Round

Cup matches watched this season: 29

Home wins: 17

Away wins: 6

Draws: 3

Games at neutral venues: 3

Number of competitions watched: 13

Home goals: 64

Away goals: 38

Goals at neutral venues: 15

Total goals: 117

PICTURES EXTRA

Another hotly contested battle for possession.

The away team’s coach keeps a close eye on the action.

“You OK there, son? Yes? OK, get up and get on with it.” No room for rolling about and whingeing at this level.

Looking towards the clubhouse end at Goverseth.

The North Petherwin keeper collects a dangerous ball into the box.

Close-up action from Foxhole Stars v North Petherwin…

… and some slightly more distant match action.

Foxhole Stars, clear another attack as North Petherwin push forward to try to get back in the cup tie.

And finally…

An Easter Swaz Teamwear selfie from Goverseth, the home of Foxhole Stars.

CONTACT

If you have any thoughts or comments about this blog, email me at thecupfootballblogger@hotmail.com; find me on Twitter via @cupfootballblog; or find me on Facebook at Peter Harlow (the cup football blogger)

THE USE OF PLASTIC

Carharrack v Perranwell

Heads up! Action from Carharrack (in red) v Perranwell in the LWC Drinks Cornwall Combination League’s Supplementary Cup Preliminary Round tie, which was played on the plastic pitch at Mounts Bay Academy, Penzance.

I AM FEELING EVER SO SLIGHTLY SMUG. Ever since that nice Mr Attenborough – sorry, I mean Sir David – scared the living daylights out of us all with his TV programme about global marine pollution, my family have been doing their bit to help.

We now have a milkman. And he delivers his milk in reusable glass bottles. No more single-use plastic cartons. I am so pleased with myself. Plastic is evil and I am doing my bit to defeat it.

But…

When it comes to the beautiful game rather the beautiful ocean, plastic can be fantastic or, at the very least, most helpful.

With Cornwall, and much of the rest of the country, swamped by a deluge of unending rain that would test even the patience of Noah, artificial playing services have come into their own this season as beleaguered clubs and competitions struggle to complete their fixture lists.

This particular fixture illustrates that point perfectly. As this game kicked off, ambitious Carharrack had played just under half of their Cornwall Combination league games, just 17 out of 38 matches, while visitors Perranwell had played just three more. They are both going to have very, very busy ends to the season.

And this particular tie, in the Preliminary Round of the league’s Supplementary Cup, was already a week late. It was meant to have been played on the previous Saturday but Carharrack’s home pitch was waterlogged. The teams tried to switch it to Perranwell but the pitch there failed an inspection too.

There then followed some social media chatter about teams wanting or not wanting to play it on plastic but it stayed firmly postponed. So, fast forward seven days, and no chances were being taken this time. The 3G pitch at Mounts Bay Academy in Heamoor, on the edge of Penzance, was booked and it was game on. (Incidentally, I know that Mounts Bay should have an apostrophe, Mount’s Bay, but that is not how the school spells it – sometimes I despair).

So full credit to both sides for finally getting it on, and extra credit to Carharrack for giving up home advantage and moving the match to a venue more than 20 miles away. That counts as real determination to play a game of football.

And, while I am in a giving mood, let’s give some credit to the league, too.

This cup competition is for teams who have been knocked out in the Preliminary and First Rounds of the actual League Cup and gives players more games to play – which, as they are doing it for fun, supposedly, is a good thing – and gives teams an extra chance of getting their hands on some silverware. And, as we all know, that’s what it’s all about at the end of the day, Brian.

Hard-fought midfield action from Carharrack v Perranwell in the LWC Drinks Cornwall Combination League Supplementary Cup.

The Combination committee must have been tempted to drop the Supp Cup for this season, given the fixture backlog, but they have decided to plough on with it, unlike the neighbouring Trelawny League which decided to abandon all of its cups a few weeks back in an attempt to get the season finished somewhere close to on time. As you might expect, I was not a fan of that decision, so am happy to hand out plaudits to a league which decided to battle on.

But I was a bit worried about this match.

For a start, Carharrack wouldn’t have been expecting to play it. They are, after all, the reigning league champions and are eyeing promotion from this Step Eight league to Step Seven football in the South West Peninsula League. They would have been confident of a decent run in the Combo Cup but, in the first round, came up against current league leaders Perranporth, who prevailed 1-0.

With so many games still left to play, would Carharrack really be up for a cup tie in a lesser competition?

As for Perranwell, well I had seen them lose their Preliminary Round League Cup tie at home to West Cornwall back in September and I didn’t want to feel as if I was jinxing them.

And there was the issue of the plastic.

As mentioned above, these artificial surfaces are great for playing matches and catching up with a backlog of fixtures, but why are they often in such soulless surroundings? This was the second time in a few weeks that I had been to a cup tie on a school pitch and it has to be said that the surroundings on both occasions felt a bit, well, barren.

Maybe it’s the tall mesh fences that enclose the playing area, maybe it is the slightly over-green colour of the surface, maybe it’s that an empty secondary school on a Saturday afternoon just naturally feels as if it is missing something, but it can be really hard to create that sense of atmosphere, that sense of occasion, which elevates a cup tie to a level above the mundane.

Yes, it’s fair to say that I had my doubts about this one.

Those doubts grew when, due to some imprecise planning, I only arrived at the school about ten minutes before kick-off and only got to the pitch about five minutes before it was due to start – and there was no one there? Was I in the wrong place? Was there another pitch? Had I just dreamt up this fixture?

I had to go and find someone to ask. I found them in the car park and they, too, were convinced there was a game on. Good, I reasoned, we can’t all be going mad. Unless they were figments of my imagination too..

 

Looking across to the dugouts, and spare goals, at Mounts Bay Academy in Penzance, the venue for the cup clash between Carharrack and Perranwell.

It took a couple of minutes to traipse back to the pitch and, when I got there, glory be, the two teams had emerged from dressing rooms on the opposite side of the sports building to where I had been and there was no doubt that there was a match on. Result!

A colourful scene it was, too, with the scarlet red of Carharrack pitted against the vivid blue and black of Perranwell, all set against a shiny green surface. Even though it had started to rain yet again, it was a bright scene.

And the “home” side certainly started brightly, taking the lead with less than three minutes gone thanks to a long-range effort from wide out. Now, I have to confess that I nearly missed it. I was just writing something in my notebook and only glanced up when that inexplicable sense of anticipation and excitement started to tingle through the small crowd of 20 or fewer souls.

I looked up just in time to see the Perranwell keeper arching and leaping backwards in a hopeless attempt to reach a ball that was clearly destined for the top corner.

Cue much shouting and joy from Carharrack, bowed heads from Perran, and a concerned thought from me that that might be the only goal of the game and I hadn’t seen it properly. Hmm.

A few moments later, I had a bit more to be concerned about. With nothing to separate spectator from player, it is quite easy to edge quite close to the white lines, to really get a feel of being in the thick of the action. I found myself doing that and then had to back away quickly when the action came a bit too close. Behind me was one of the spare small-sided goals that seem to litter plastic pitch touchlines everywhere. I caught my heel on the stanchion and began to feel myself falling backwards.

With just myself and the linesman on this side of pitch, I knew that any tumble would be greeted with delightful derision by those opposite. Spurred on by this fear of humiliation, I ignored my lack of athleticism, took a couple of extra dance steps backwards and retained my upright position and my dignity.

The things I go through to bring you these hard-won words, dear reader.

 

A Swaz Teamwear selfie on another glorious Cornish spring day!

Meanwhile, back on the pitch, there was huff and puff and occasional outbreaks of neat football, but clear chances were few and far between. Carharrack managed to hit the roof of the sports centre with one effort on goal, real Row Z stuff, and Perranwell almost equalised late on in the half only to be denied in a one-on-one. It was looking ever more likely that that half-seen goal might be the only one of the day.

At half-time, Perranwell dutifully trooped off to the dressing rooms but Carharrack stayed on the pitch and got their half-time team talk in public view, Phil Brown-style.

I carefully earwigged it from a distance and it soon became clear that I should have had no doubts about Carharrack’s desire to win this game. Even though they were a goal up, the boss was not a happy man. This game, this cup tie, really did matter to them.

The second half was a much livelier affair, with a better standard of football producing a number of chances at each end, but that elusive next goal just would not come.

With just over 15 minutes to go, Perranwell got the best chance they were to have all game but, from a good shooting position, the ball was sent flying just over the bar.

And then finally, finally, a second goal of the game did arrive. There were just five minutes left when Carharrack found their way through for a second time to seal their place in the quarter-finals of the Supplementary Cup. They will be hoping that they now have a total of three more cup games to add to their crowded fixture list, with a cup and winners’ medals being the ultimate reward for their endeavours.

As for Perranwell, I can only offer my apologies for being present at a second cup defeat of the season for them. I promise to steer clear next year.

And as for me, well I was happy that my efforts to get to a game had been rewarded with a decent cup tie and at least one goal that I saw clearly. I went home to celebrate with a nice glass of cold milk, poured from a turtle-friendly glass bottle.

Smug, I was. Smug.

THE STATISTICS BIT AND MORE PICTURES

Carharrack 2 Perranwell 0

(Half-time 1-0)

Played at Mounts Bay Academy, Heamoor, Penzance, on Saturday, March 24, 2018

LWC Drinks Cornwall Combination League Supplementary Cup Preliminary Round

Cup matches watched this season: 28

Home wins: 16

Away wins: 6

Draws: 3

Games at neutral venues: 3

Number of competitions watched: 13

Home goals: 61

Away goals: 37

Goals at neutral venues: 15

Total goals: 113

PICTURES EXTRA

Action from Carharrack v Perranwell.

Action from Carharrack v Perranwell.

Action from Carharrack v Perranwell.

A man kicking off.

Action from Carharrack v Perranwell.

Action from Carharrack v Perranwell.

CONTACT

If you have any thoughts or comments about this blog, email me at thecupfootballblogger@hotmail.com; find me on Twitter via @cupfootballblog; or find me on Facebook at Peter Harlow (the cup football blogger)

 

TIME AND ACCOMPLISHMENT

Godolphin Atlantic v Falmouth Town

And the winner is … players and officials from Falmouth Town huddle up after their dramatic extra time win over Godolphin Atlantic in the Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup semi-final under the new lights at Sticker FC’s Burngullow Park.

DESPITE THE BEST ATTEMPTS OF a grammar school education to ruin it by making it seem so dull, I still like English literature. I am happy to read a wide range of things but sometimes it’s nice to turn to a true classic and experience the quality and craftsmanship of a piece which renders it timeless.

At school, back in the 1970s, I just didn’t deal with Dickens at all. Didn’t like it. Now, I can’t get enough of it. All the way from the charm and humour of The Pickwick Papers to the drama and deep dark psychology of Our Mutual Friend, Charlie boy was a writing genius.

And I must be one of the very few football fans who has been engrossed in reading Thomas Hardy’s Far From The Madding Crowd while on a train on the way to a game.

And last Wednesday, at Sticker, in deepest rural mid-Cornwall, I was struck by the uncanny similarity between Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s Crime And Punishment and the Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup semi-final between Godolphin Atlantic and Falmouth Town.

They both took a long time to get going.

The book is a determined slog for about 300 pages until Raskolnikov kills the old woman*, and then it turns into a thrill-a-minute rollercoaster of contrasting, tortured emotions.

The same happened on Wednesday night, only it was Dave Broglino’s 30-yard screamer on 64 minutes that turned this tale from a bit of a battle into an absolute belter of a cup tie, a crackerjack of a story with twists and turns galore.

Up until that point, I thought I was going to have to write an in-depth essay on the nature of floodlights as the new illuminations at the neutral venue of Sticker’s Burngullow Park looked like they might be the brightest point of the evening.

The new lights at Burngullow Park, Sticker, shine down on the action and the covered stand areas.

They had certainly helped guide me to the ground. I have been to Sticker several times but never in the dark – there were no floodlights before so why would I have been? – and the pitch is always further along the lane than I think it is, meaning I get my navigational knickers in a twist and worry that I have gone wrong. Not this time, though. The lights were a beautiful beacon in the Cornish dark, a balm to the over-excited mind of a bewildered blogger.

In short, the lights made finding the ground easier.

It’s a feeling that most football fans know from the days before sat-nav, when balancing a road atlas on your knees as you drove through an unfamiliar town on the way to a new ground was a recipe for disaster. But, if you saw the lights in the distance, you could always find a way to reach them, to reach the holy grail of a football game. Even now, when in a place I have never been before, I find the sight of floodlights a comfort.

Although, if I do see lights and I think there is a game on and I am not going to it, I do get a bit grumpy.

There is something about floodlights that adds to the atmosphere of a football match, that adds to the drama of the occasion. And they have certainly added to the charm and aura of Burngullow Park, which looked in fine fettle as it prepared to host this semi-final.

But, for 64 minutes, it looked like a case of right place at the wrong time, as the game failed to spring into action. Falmouth Town, flying high in the SWPL Premier Division, were the favourites but mid-table Godolphin, from Newquay, have developed a bit of a reputation as cup fighters over the last few seasons and, in truth, there was very little between the teams.

The G had the game’s first effort on target after 30 minutes, which resulted in a straightforward save, while Falmouth waited until right at the end of the first 45 before mustering their best chance of the half but it came to nothing.

In fact, some of the most noteworthy things of the first half were the increasingly desperate shouts of “time” as team-mates tried to persuade their colleagues that they did indeed have the time to get the ball down and play – although, in truth, nobody did as the tackles and challenges flew in. It was a scrap.

That all changed on 64 minutes, thanks to Mr Broglino. I had seen him score a few spectacular goals for his previous club, Penryn, but this was something special. He let fly from distance and it flew into the top corner. I was more or less in line with him when he hit it and immediately noted down that it was a 25-yarder, but then spent the next few minutes revising and rethinking my estimate. I crossed out 25 and put in 30. On further reflection, it was probably more like 27 but whoever wrote: “He opened the scoring with a 27-yarder”?

Anyway, and to coin a cliché, it’s fair to say that it was a goal worthy of winning any game. Although it didn’t win this one.

With 14 minutes to go, Godolphin conjured up a well-finished, and well-deserved, leveller and we were heading to the delights of extra time yet again – the third time in a row that a match I was at had needed an extra 30 minutes of action to decide it.

This blurry picture shows the speed at which the game was played. Or that my camera-phone was not up to it. You decide.

Now, in my mind, cup semi-finals are always associated with the joys of spring, with sharp sunshine, lighter days and a bit of extra warmth. But it was cold at Sticker. The crowd was almost as mobile as the players towards the end of the 90 minutes as we all jigged about a bit to try to keep warm, with knees bending, arms flailing and hands clapping. To anyone watching from a spaceship it must have looked like a spectacularly badly choreographed session of line dancing.

Luckily, extra time really did warm us up as the action got hotter, and more heated. The old lady was dead and real drama had broken out.

In the first half of extra time The G were awarded a penalty for a trip in the box. It was hit home confidently and it looked as if one penalty might spare us the pain of a multi-penalty shootout. Two minutes into the second half of extra time, though, another penalty made penalties more likely as Broglino converted a spot-kick for Falmouth to make it 2-2.

I was on the touchline midway through the half Fal were defending and, as Broglino stepped up to take the pen at the other end of the ground, the Town keeper was wandering around near me, with his eyes half-closed, mumbling to himself: “Come on now, Brog, come on now,” and he then let out a roar as the ball thumped into the net. Nice to see a bit of cup football emotion coming to the fore.

He was celebrating again just four minutes later as Falmouth edged ahead again, with Luke Brabyn heading in at the far post. This time, the cup joy was unbounded as the players and substitutes and the coaches all celebrated together in and around the dugout.

In the build-up to the goal, one of the Godolphin defenders had gone down with cramp as he attempted to make a tackle, leaving open the space for the eventual cross that led to the goal. It was another throwback moment to the 1970s when no self-respecting cup final was complete without players going down with cramp and completing the game with their socks around their ankles. I have no idea why they did that as I am sure it is not an acknowledged medical cure but it is an image from my childhood that I cannot shake.

I am sure, also, that it will not be a happy memory for the Godolphin player who went down, and his misery would have been compounded three minutes from time when Falmouth were awarded a second penalty from which Broglino completed his hat-trick and with which he secured a place in the final for the favourites.

That was more or less the end of the drama. There was still time for The G to fume about the latest spot-kick decision and then have one of their players sent off right on time for his part in a 22-man melee which had been brewing all night, but that all felt a bit like an epilogue to the main tale.

The opening chapters might have been slow going but, by the end of extra-time, this footballing story could truly be dubbed a Dickens of a cup tie. Or perhaps a tale of three penalties. A bit of a classic, in fact.

The End

*No old ladies were harmed in the writing of this blog.

THE STATISTICS BIT AND MORE PICTURES

Godolphin Atlantic 2 Falmouth Town 4 (after extra time)

(Half-time 0-0. Half-time in extra time 2-1)

Played at Burngullow Park, Sticker FC, on Wednesday, March 21, 2018

Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup semi-final

Cup matches watched this season: 27

Home wins: 15

Away wins: 6

Draws: 3

Games at neutral venues: 3

Number of competitions watched: 12

Home goals: 59

Away goals: 37

Goals at neutral venues: 15

Total goals: 111

PICTURES EXTRA

Action from Godolphin Atlantic v Falmouth Town.

A crescent moon added to the atmosphere. (It is there if you look really closely, honest).

Godolphin clear another Falmouth attack.

CONTACT

If you have any thoughts or comments about this blog, email me at thecupfootballblogger@hotmail.com; find me on Twitter via @cupfootballblog; or find me on Facebook at Peter Harlow (the cup football blogger)

NEW TALES TO TELL

AFC St Austell v Mousehole

Mousehole v Teignmouth

Teignmouth repel another Mousehole attack in the SWPL Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup quarter-final at Trungle Parc.

Blurry, floodlit match action from the St Austell v Mousehole Cornwall Senior Cup semi-final at Helston Athletic’s Kellaway Park.

LEGEND HAS IT THAT A BRAVE FISHERMAN called Tom Bawcock once saved the villagers of Mousehole from starvation.

A prolonged period of stormy weather (In Cornwall? Never!) meant that none of the boats in the port could get out to catch the fish which the local residents relied on to survive.

Eventually, the aforementioned Mr Bawcock decided that somebody had to do something and so he weighed anchor, sailed out into the stormy seas and prayed that Providence would provide. It did – although a later version of the story claims that a special feline might also have been involved (look up The Mousehole Cat) – and he returned to the village with a full catch.

The villagers baked the fish into a number of stargazy pies (horrible-looking things with the fish heads sticking out of the top) and the people of Mousehole were saved. Famine had turned into feast.

There’s something of the redoubtable spirit of Tom Bawcock in place at Mousehole FC nowadays.

When I first visited the club’s Trungle Parc ground, back in the bad old days before this blog existed, it was still a nice place to visit but there was also a slightly bleak atmosphere in the air, a feel of a club running on empty, of a club just existing, not progressing.

Oh my, how times have changed.

Over the past few days I have twice seen the men in green win in extra-time in hard-fought cup games, including making their own piece of history in the Cornwall Senior Cup by reaching the final for the very first time, and there are plans in place to make the future for The Seagulls brighter than it has ever been.

A famine of hope has been replaced by a feast of expectations.

A lot of those expectations are to do with the club’s new Endorsed Academy, which has links to Leeds United and aims to give youngsters in this forgotten footballing corner of the South West a better chance than they have ever had to progress to the higher echelons of the game. If, along the way, the influx of talent helps Mousehole to progress up the leagues, well, they won’t be complaining.

(For more on the Mousehole mission, see Chris Matthews’ excellent recent piece on cornwalllive.com).

I didn’t have the highest of expectations for The Seagulls last Wednesday night, though, as I rocked up at Helston Athletic’s Kellaway Park ground to see them take on St Austell in the semi-finals of the RGB Building Supplies-sponsored Cornwall Senior Cup. The Saints, after all, were SWPL champions just three seasons ago, are in the top six this season and are the holders of the Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup, having beaten Exmouth Town in last year’s final.

I also have a bit of a soft spot for The Lillywhites. When I started this series of blogs three seasons ago, St Austell were the talk of the Cornish footballing scene. They had caught the imagination with a startling run to the semi-finals of the FA Vase and the excitement which surrounded that was one of the drivers for this blogging idea. Indeed, the very first piece I wrote was about them winning an FA Cup tie back in August 2015.

Some more blurry, floodlit match action from the St Austell v Mousehole Cornwall Senior Cup semi-final at Kellaway Park.

Last Wednesday, I confidently expected them to see off the challenge of Mousehole who, although flying high, ply their trade a division below St Austell. However, as a man who once had to sack himself at Christmas from managing his own fantasy league team, I should know better than to listen to my own predictions.

Mousehole certainly didn’t listen. In front of a crowd of almost 400 hardy paying souls, they took the lead after just five minutes, although St Austell levelled things up 11 minutes later. More important than all that, though, was that I got my first touch after just 40 seconds! I was the first person in the ground to indulge in a spot of ball retrieval after it rolled under an advertising hoarding, something which pleased me ridiculously.

Two hours later, we were all still waiting to see who would make it through to the final.

There had been no more goals since the Lillywhites’ equaliser but there had been plenty of action, including several melees and a red card apiece as tempers boiled over, and a growing sense that Mousehole were getting stronger and stronger as time went by while St Austell seemed to be getting a little bit more desperate. It’s fun being a potential giantkiller but quite stressful being the giant.

The good people of Helston Athletic FC had done a sterling job of getting their ever-improving ground ready for this encounter. I would rank them up there with Mousehole as one of the most progressive clubs in Cornwall, with more and more teams, better and better facilities, including floodlights, and a thriving social side, as well as making giant strides on the pitch over recent seasons as they moved from the Cornwall Combination up to the SWPL Premier.

They stepped in at the last-minute to stage this match. It was down to be played at Falmouth Town but, when winter storms blew part of the roof at Bickland Park into the car park behind the goal, Helston stepped in and offered Kellaway Park as a venue. It looked immaculate at kick-off but, once the match went into extra time, the pitch began to look as muddy and bedraggled as some of the tiring players – and supporters. Would that slow down Mousehole’s nimble passing game? Or would a big and strong St Austell side have the power to thrive or would they get bogged down in the mud.

Preparing for extra time in the Cornwall Senior Cup semi-final between St Austell and Mousehole.

The answer came after 115 minutes. St Austell were annoyed when one of their attackers was ruled offside, livid when Mousehole took the free-kick so quickly that they believed the ball was still moving, and then apoplectic when The Seagulls broke forward at pace and finally found a way through the Lillywhites’ defence for a second time. Cue outrage and another bust-up with the officials.

Then deep into injury time at the end of extra time came the final drama of the evening. St Austell launched everyone, including the goalkeeper, forward for one last chance, there was a scramble and then the ball fell to a Lillywhites’ boot with the goal gaping. They must score. Penalties were now inevitable.

They didn’t and they weren’t.

The chance was missed and then, with the St Austell keeper still upfield, Mousehole broke away. The keeper scampered back as fast as he good but the attacker was just too quick and rolled the ball in for The Seagulls’ third goal and a place in the Cornwall Senior Cup final for the first time in their history.

What a night, what drama, what a game. And while the weary whites went home to lick their wounds, the glorious greens could celebrate hard and enjoy their success.

Apart from the fact that, four days later, they had to do it all over again, this time at their own Trungle Parc ground in the quarter-finals of the good old CSWPLWCPFD League Cup. And, this time, they could be classed as the overdogs rather than the under ones.

OK, so Teignmouth play at the same level, in Division One East of the SWPL rather than Mousehole’s Division One West, and The Teigns are having their own run at cup glory this season, having reached the semi-finals of the Devon Premier Cup. But the visitors had had to make an arduous 260-mile round trip for this fixture and I had been so impressed with Mousehole on the Wednesday night that I could only see one winner. The home side would triumph.

Teignmouth took the lead after 15 minutes.

While the punditry part of my soul was wounded by this, overall I was quietly pleased. Firstly, it wouldn’t be the one-sided affair I suspected that this cup tie might be and, secondly, I have a soft spot for Teignmouth too.

When I was child growing up in deepest South London, my mum and dad worked hard to make sure we had a decent holiday each year and, twice, Teignmouth was their chosen destination. I loved it there and some of my favourite memories of growing up include playing on the beach, being astounded by the train tracks on the sea wall, happily climbing the hill to the lodge where we staying after another long day enjoying ourselves, and walking around the town in the rain. I should have learnt my lesson then about the weather in this part of the world!

So I was quietly, nostalgically, pleased when The Teigns took the lead.

Teignmouth’s players celebrate taking the lead in the Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup quarter-final at Mousehole …

Two minutes later, the home side were level – a cracking shot from the right-hand edge of the box taking a slight deflection as it whistled in. And that would be the cue for Mousehole to take control, I thought, but it really wasn’t.

From then on, it was another, but less bad-tempered, tight cup tie of few clear-cut chances. We had plenty of Mousehole possession and invention, plenty of Teignmouth tenacity and gumption, but no more goals. Never mind, though, the sun was out, the skies were blue, and the nearby bells of Paul church were pealing loudly in the near-distance. It was all jolly nice.

I am not sure how nice it felt for the home side’s players, though, when the final whistle went and they were contemplating a second session of extra time in just four days. There would definitely be some tired legs out there, Brian.

Mousehole did hit the post in the first half of extra time while Teignmouth came close to breaking the deadlock 35 seconds into the second extra period but, as the clock ticked on, I began to wonder if, this time, it would go all the way to penalties. I quietly predicted to myself that it would.

Mousehole scored the winner on 109 minutes.

…but Mousehole have the last word as they celebrate their extra-time winner.

A lovely piece of skill and movement on the left wing finally unlocked the resolute Teignmouth defence and a super cross was finished off in style with a flying header at the far post.

And so a fabulous four-day feast of football came to an end after two cup ties, two two-hour-long matches, two battling performances in defeat by St Austell and Teignmouth, and two tremendous triumphs for upwardly mobile Mousehole.

Now the port’s villagers don’t only have the legend of Tom Bawcock to regale the tourists with, they have some fabulous footballing tales to tell, too.

Now, if they could only find a better-looking pie to celebrate with…

THE STATISTICS BIT AND MORE PICTURES

AFC St Austell 1 Mousehole 3 (after extra time)

(Half-time 1-1. Half-time in extra time 1-1)

Played at Kellaway Park, Helston Athletic, on Wednesday, March 7, 2018

RGB Building Supplies Cornwall Senior Cup semi-final

PLUS

Mousehole 2 Teignmouth 1 (after extra time)

(Half-time 1-1. Half-time in extra-time 1-1).

Played at Trungle Parc, Mousehole, on Saturday, March 10, 2018.

Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup quarter-final

Cup matches watched this season: 26

Home wins: 15

Away wins: 6

Draws: 3

Games at neutral venues: 2

Number of competitions watched: 12

Home goals: 59

Away goals: 37

Goals at neutral venues: 9

Total goals: 105

PICTURES EXTRA

Yet more blurry, floodlit match action from the St Austell v Mousehole Cornwall Senior Cup semi-final at Helston Athletic’s Kellaway Park.

No quarter given in the Cornwall Senior Cup semi-final between Mousehole and St Austell.

Goalmouth action from the Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup quarter-final between Mousehole and Teignmouth.

A sign of the progressive times at Mousehole FC’s Trungle Parc ground.

Fun in the sun at Trungle Parc, Mousehole.

More goalmouth action from the Carlsberg South West Peninsula League Walter C Parson Funeral Directors League Cup quarter-final between Mousehole and Teignmouth.

A general view of Trungle Parc during the CSWPLWCPFD League Cup quarter-final.

CONTACT

If you have any thoughts or comments about this blog, email me at thecupfootballblogger@hotmail.com; find me on Twitter via @cupfootballblog; or find me on Facebook at Peter Harlow (the cup football blogger)

SHINY, HAPPY, FOOTBALL PEOPLE

Helston Athletic Reserves v Perranporth

A proper cup football, muddy goalmouth scramble as Helston Athletic Reserves (in blue) pushed for an equaliser against Perranporth in the LWC Drinks Cornwall Combination League Cup semi-final, played at Illogan RBL’s neat Oxland Parc ground.

IT MAY NOT BE TO EVERYONE’S taste but I am a fan of Top Gear. The old Top Gear, the new Top Gear and the Amazon Top Gear which, although it is not called Top Gear is, in essence, Top Gear.

And a particular moment from the show popped into my mind at Illogan RBL’s ground on Sunday, the venue for my first cup semi-final of the season, in this case the Cornwall Combination League Cup semi between league leaders Perranporth and sixth-placed Helston Athletic Reserves.

In the show, the infamous TG trio are at a motoring event, along with lots of other petrolheads. At one stage, Clarkson turns to Hammond and says something like: “Isn’t it nice to be able to be a car person again while we are here? We can talk about suspension and brakes and cylinders and nobody looks bored or thinks we are mad and dull.” Hammond, in his best puppy-like fashion, nods and agrees enthusiastically.

I felt like that at Oxland Parc on Sunday, when it was nice to be a football person.

Many of the great and good of Cornwall’s footballing fraternity were in attendance, mostly doing their best to find some cover as the rain poured down for almost all of the first half. Well, at least the snow had gone. On Thursday night, Illogan’s pitch had been under a deep covering of the white stuff and this tie looked very much in doubt. So much so, in fact, that on Saturday I had gone to a LEAGUE game, there being nothing else on, just to give me a back-up blog if this tie was off.

But the volunteers at Oxland Parc, in particular Steve Abbott-Smith, had worked wonders on the pitch and the game was definitely on. OK, so it was a bit muddy, and the extra rainfall didn’t help, but it was eminently playable and they were rewarded with a very good turnout.

I spent much of the first half chatting to the likes of Dave Deacon, from the Cornish Football Forum, and Richard Full, the former Helston first-team coach, and then had a second half conversation with my former boss, local sports journalist Matt Dixon. Everywhere around the ground there were similar discussions going on as people from various clubs all over Cornwall caught up with one another and spent time talking about, and enjoying, the football.

For a Cornish football person, it was the place to be.

And there was a very decent game of football going on for us football people to enjoy.

The excellent matchday programme.

The excellent matchday programme – free with the £3 entry fee – set things up nicely, with a history of the cup, a summary of how the teams had got this far and a league table to remind us that Perran are ten points clear at the top, although the likes of Falmouth Town Reserves and Carharrack could still put them under pressure with their games in hand.

There was real sense of occasion around Oxland Parc – with it being a semi-final, a rare Sunday fixture and a neutral venue, all the ingredients were there. This was definitely not your ordinary, run-of-the-mill football game. There was an extra edge in the air, an extra sharpness in the atmosphere, an extra sense of theatre.

Even the downpour which arrived before kick-off failed to dampen the excitement, the mad scramble for cover merely adding to the entertainment (I managed to find a handy sheltered spot by the tea hut – I am an old hand at this)!

Favourites Perranporth didn’t look like they were phased by the occasion, though, and they started off in dominant form, pinning the blue shirts of Helston back in and around their box for long periods. It only took the league leaders 11 minutes to make the breakthrough, Jack Bradshaw beating the keeper with a powerful header.

On 25 minutes, they extended the lead to 2-0, Justin Miles finishing neatly after a nice pull-back from Reece Monteith.

It felt at that moment as if the neutrals in the crowd might have to make their own entertainment from now on as Perran were well on top. Well, the ref fell over and got his hands wet and muddy – that raised a cheer and a smile from everyone. There’s little funnier than a ref falling over. It’s making me smile again now as I think about it and I am tempted to drop into text-style speech and do a little smiley face. But I won’t. There are standards to observe, after all.

What those of us lucky enough to be at Illogan on Sunday began to observe at this stage, though, was a fightback by Helston. Twelve minutes before the interval, they pulled a goal back with a hanging header by Mike Hallibone. I’d love to describe the cross that led to it but, from my vantage point beside the aforementioned tea hut, the top-end, right-hand side part of the ground was hidden from view by the side of the grandstand. At this point, it was still raining and no one was brave enough to venture out for a better view. “You might not get your space back,” observed Dave Deacon. He is an old hand at this sort of thing, too.

The general half-time observation was that Helston were now right back in it, especially as they would be kicking down the slope in the second half. The rain had also eased off and we all began to tentatively emerge from our sheltered spots in search of a better view and a bit of hopeful sunshine – like a host of little footballing flowers.

A decent crowd rocked up at Oxland Parc, the home of Illogan RBL, for this Cornwall Combination League Cup semi-final, most of whom were hidden under cover until the rain stopped in the second half!

After a relatively quiet start to the second half, we were all thoroughly rewarded as this bloomed into a full-on, blood and thunder, thud and blunder, lower league, muddy cup tie.

The Premier League pundits might have been full of phrases such as “they need to take more care of the ball” and “they are sitting too deep now” and even “it’s not one for the purist” but this was proper cup football drama at its rawest. Fifteen pretty passes, a couple of nice touches and a healthy lead in the possession statistics weren’t going to cut the Combo Cup mustard – this was all about doing what it takes to win.

As the Helston blues poured forward in search of their equaliser, the Perran reds dug deeper and deeper and weren’t taking any chances with their clearances, the ball frequently flying out of the ground or deep onto the neighbouring pitch. In my days as a short, but determined, centre-half on glorious Mitcham Common in South London, I was known for my ability to clear a ball at least a whole pitch away, in order to give myself a rest and thoroughly annoy our opponents. And during my time “oop north” I achieved a lifetime’s ambition in a game at Alnwick Town when I hoofed the ball over the grandstand and down the road. ‘Ave it.

Back in Cornwall, Helston were still pushing forward but, as so often happens in cup ties, they were punished for not making their pressure count. Perran almost nicked a third on 72 minutes, only to be denied by a good save but, a minute later, they did move 3-1 ahead, Chris Wood netting. Game over? Not if Helston had anything to do with it.

A man taking a goal-kick. He didn’t get there quite as quickly as I had anticipated.

They resumed their bombardment of the Perran goal and, ten minutes later, finally found a way through. They needed a bit of help, though, Perranporth’s unfortunate Bradshaw heading yet another high ball into the box into his own net. In the footballing vernacular he had now “scored at both ends” although both of his goals had come at the same end. Are you keeping up?

With almost a quarter of an hour to go, plus seven or eight minutes of injury time to play for all the ball-retrieval antics, there was still plenty of time for more drama, for more tension to be ratcheted up, for the shadow of possible extra time and penalties to loom over the occasion.

Helston kept piling forward, Perranporth kept repelling wave after wave of cup-tie attacking onslaught, and everyone on both sides could safely be said to be “putting in a shift”. It was tiring just watching.

At the final whistle, there were Perran cheers and Helston blues, but no real over-exuberance. Both sides were too tired to get over-excited either way.

There was still a pleasant murmur of conversation all around the ground, the gentle buzz you get at the end of a good match, as we all filed away to the bar or our cars for the journey home. That was a proper cup tie, a proper cup occasion, a properly good day to be a football person.

Roll on the next one.

BLOG BONUS: So what was my back-up plan on Saturday, which league game did I grace with my presence? Well, it was a second visit in a few weeks to the 3G pitch at Penryn College,this time  to see Frogpool & Cusgarne Reserves take on St Buryan Reserves in Division Three of the Trelawny League. With the league having abandoned all its cup competitions this year because of a fixture backlog (boo, hiss) this would be a rare chance to see Trelawny sides in action. F&C FC have won every game they have played in the league this season and duly made it 13 wins out of 13 with a comfortable 5-1 win. They took the lead after just nine minutes and, although Saints levelled almost immediately, Frogpool were ahead by the break and then scored three times in the first twenty minutes of the second half to complete the victory. OK, so it didn’t have the drama of a full-on cup tie but it was still a decent game to watch – and it got me out of the house on a Saturday afternoon (smiley face).

THE STATISTICS BIT AND MORE PICTURES

Helston Athletic Reserves 2 Perranporth 3

(Half-time 1-2)

Played at Oxland Parc, Illogan RBL, on Sunday, March 4, 2018

LWC Drinks Cornwall Combination League Cup semi-final

Cup matches watched this season: 24

Home wins: 14

Away wins: 6

Draws: 3

Games at neutral venues: 1

Number of competitions watched: 12

Home goals: 57

Away goals: 36

Goals at neutral venues: 5

Total goals: 98

PICTURES EXTRA

Some more photographs from the Combination Cup semi-final between Perranporth (in red) and Helston Athletic Reserves.

Helston Athletic Reserves (in blue) piled the pressure on Perranporth in the second half of the Combination League Cup semi-final but couldn’t take the tie to extra time.

A rare Sunday Swaz Teamwear selfie.